Throughout my pregnancy, Moms kept telling me this fact over and over. They said to sleep when the baby sleeps, ask a friend or family member to help you clean your house or do laundry, focus on the baby and not the dust, etc. I heard them. I listened to them. I accepted their advice. But just after Charlie was born, I found myself trying to catch up on errands and tasks while he was sleeping. I was uploading photos to Walgreen's at 2am. I did housework and laundry throughout the day. I tried to tackle new projects too. In the end, all it got me was tired AND a dirty house. And I was even more stressed because I was thinking about the projects I tried to start but left undone.
Now that I've gone back to work, I feel this even more. I come home and all I want to do is spend time with Charlie to make up for being gone all day. Once he goes to bed, I do a few things and then it's time for me to get in bed unless I only want 2 hours of sleep. The laundry is piling up. The dishes are undone. The mail is unopened. When will it ever end? I'm beginning to think never. Seriously. I think this is my life, at least until he's old enough to go outside and play on his own. Only then will I gain back some time to do all the things I used to do before I became a Mom. Now I understand why my baby book is not quite finished or my scrapbook of memories from my childhood is not glued down. Mom never had time to do it. And when she did, it didn't quite make it to the top of her list. That was reserved for groceries, cooking, cleaning, and laundry.
I guess all I can do now is to try to become more efficient. Learn from my mistakes. Try, fail or succeed. Until then, if you see me and my hair is a mess or I smell like a garbage truck, please say a kind word to me. Lend me some support. Offer to clean my bathroom. One day I'll get better. But until then, this is my life as a Mom. And I LOVE every minute of it!
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